Aspen Radio Ad 2 is a cassette tape in Wasteland 3.
Description[]
An ancient cassette tape. A hastily scrawled label reads, 'DO NOT AIR'.
Transcript[]
Summit Ski Lodge and Resort ad: take one. Go ahead, Mr. Torrance.
Experience the pinnacle of...luxury? Are you fucking kidding me?
What?
I've been to that fuckin' place! You ride up in this fuckin' party bus, and by the time you get to the lodge you're wrecked!
Uh. Okay -
And everybody's lookin' to score. Talk about powder - the piano player in the fuckin' club will sell you shit that will blow your mind!
Wow. Okay. But -
Snort a line off some rich girl's ass and get a handy in the sauna! Yodel-ay-hee-hoo baby!
Wow. Yeah. That's...great. Let's stick to what's in the script though, okay?
Huh? Oh. Yeah. Sure.
Experience the pinnacle of luxury at the breathtaking Summit Ski Resort and Lodge.
Yep. Uh...\"\n\"Experience the pinnacle of luxury at the-
Luxury!?! Ha! They're kidding, right? I been to that place, and lemme tell ya, it ain't been 'luxurious' since Liberace was knee-high to a candelabra.
Uh...
I got comped a night there, and lemme tell ya, that place hasn't been 'luxurious' since 1968.
The lobby looks like the snack bar at a drive-in, and the room had lime green carpet and orange walls. Orange!
Mr. Torrance, we only have you booked for like half an-
And the food! Prawns in aspic, lobster Newberg - the whole menu looked like it'd been cooked thirty years ago! And tasted like it'd been heated up thirty minutes ago.
Mr. Torrance...
All right, all right. It's not me who's gonna get sued for false advertising. Let's go. Take two.
Location[]
- Aspen Starting location: In the northeastern hidden junk pile.